Longtime readers know about the raccoons.

How can such a smart animal be so dumb? Nearly four years since I last had fish in the pond, they're still coming around looking for fish. In fact, the earnestness of their mission has increased noticeably, and they've recruited their buddies. There's now a group of five that comes around almost every single night, and it's getting kind of nuts. Gone are the days of the placid dip in the pond, with front paws gently probing the water. Now it's a roiling ball of fur.

You'd think after four years they'd get a clue.

They've also taken an interest in standing up outside the full length glass doors on this house and gazing inside, which is kind of creepy. If I appear at the door, do they run away? No! They just come closer and try to stare me down. Last night I shined a very strong flashlight in one's face. Did that drive it away? No! It thought it was cool.

Give these animals armor and a few weapons and let's send them off to whatever battlefield. Fearless!

And I feel like those poor schmucks in that house in the country in whatever that old zombie movie is.